Self Concern...

I was reading a book which is not very popularly known.. It triggered up my thoughts... What is our fundamental, lasting interest in life????? Think for a second... Putting all oblique answers aside and dealing with this question honestly, what would be our answer??? 

Isn't it ourselves?? Anyway, that is what most of us would say if we answered honestly.. I am interested in my progress, my growth, my job, my family, the little corner in which I live, in getting better position for myself, more prestige, more power, more domination over others and so on.... 

I think it would be logical, wouldn't it... To admit ourselves that what most of us are primarily interested in - "me" first... Some of us would say that it is wrong or sinful to be primarily interested in "me" first.. But what is wrong about it except that we seldom honestly admit it?? If we accept also, mostly we are ashamed of it.. This is called hypocrisy.. One is fundamentally interested in oneself and for various cultural or traditional or ideological reasons thinks it to be wrong... 

Some may say that it is more satisfactory to help others than to think about themselves.. What is the difference??? It is still self concern.. If it gives me greater satisfaction to help others, i'm concerned about what will give me greater satisfaction... It is as simple as that.. Why to have double thinking and ideological conflict.. Satisfaction in all sorts of ways, subtle or obvious, is what we want. Ultimate satisfaction, is of course, is the peculiar idea of self-realization. 

Most of us crave for the satisfaction of having a position in society (almost everyone of us!!!).. Because we are afraid of being "nobody" in this society.. And this society is constructed such a way that someone in position is treated with respect, courtesy (or rather fear)... Whereas a man who is "nobody" in the society is kicked around.. Everyone wants to be in a position.. May be in family or office or politics or religion.. And this position must be recognized by others, otherwise its not a position at all...!!!!

Everyone crave to sit on a high platform.. Inwardly we may be shattered or in whirlpools of misery, therefore to be regarded outwardly as great figure is very gratifying...This craving for position and power, to be recognized by the society as being outstanding in one way or the other, is not bad or wrong totally.. It stems out of fear, which is the greatest problem in life... A mind that is caught in fear lives in confusion, conflict, therefore will be aggressive or distorted or both.. It dare not to move away from the same old pattern of its thinking which breeds hypocrisy..Until we free our mind from such fear, even if we invent thousand more Gods, they cant help and we will remain in darkness forever..

A Prayer for Children

We pray for children
Who gave us sticky kisses,
Who hop on rocks and chase butterflies,
Who stomp in puddles and ruin their math workbooks,
Who can never find their shoes.

And we pray for those
Who stare at photographs from behind barbed wire,
Who've never squeaked across the floor in new sneakers,
Who've never "counted potatoes"
Who are born in places we wouldn't be caught dead,
Who never go to the circus,
Who live in an X-rated world.

We pray for children
Who bring us fistfuls of dandelions and sing off key
Who have goldfish funerals, build card-table forts
Who slurp their cereal on purpose
Who put gum in their hair, put sugar in their milk
Who spit toothpaste all over the sink
Who hugs us for no reason, who bless us each night.

And we pray for those
Who never get dessert,
Who watch their parents watch them die,
Who have no safe blanket to drag behind,
Who can't find any bread to steal,
Who don't have any rooms to clean up,
Whose pictures aren't on anybody's dresser,
Whose monsters are real.

We pray for those
Who spend all their allowances before Tuesday,
Who throw tantrums in the grocery store
And pick at their food,
Who like ghost stories,
Who shove dirty clothes under the bed
And never rinse out the tub,
Who get quarters from their tooth fairy
Who don't like to be kissed in front of the carpool,
Who squirm in church and scream on the phone,
Whose tears we sometimes laugh at
And whose smiles can make us cry.

And we pray for those
Whose nightmares comes in daytime,
Who will eat anything,
Who have never seen a dentist,
Who aren't spoiled by anybody,
Who go to bed hungry and cry themselves to sleep,
Who live and move, but have no being.

We pray for children
Who want to be carried,
And for those who must.
For those we never give up on,
And for those who don't have a chance.
For those we smother,
And for those who will grab the hand of anybody kind enough to offer...

                                                                                     --- Ina J. Hughs

Let My Country Awake

Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high

Where knowledge is free

Where the world has not been broken up into fragments by narrow domestic walls

Where words come out from the depth of truth

Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection

Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way into the dreary desert sand of dead habit

Where the mind is led forward by thee into ever-widening thought and action

Into that heaven of freedom, My Father,

Let My Country Awake

                                                                                                   --- Tagore.

From Indira's diary...

"I have never felt less like dying and.... calm and peace of mind is what prompts me to write what is in the nature of a will. If I die a violent death as some fear and a few are plotting, I know the violence will be in the thought and the action of the assassin, not in my dying - for no hate is dark enough to overshadow the extent of my love for my people and my country; no force is strong enough to divert me from my purpose and my endeavour to take this country forward. A poet has written of love - 'how can i feel humble with the wealth of you beside me'. I can say the same of India. I cannot understand how anyone can be an Indian and not be proud - the richness and infinite variety of our composite heritage, the magnificence of the people's spirit, equal to any disaster or burden, firm in their faith.... even in poverty and in hardship"

Nehru wrote about the immutable power of India, insisting that it would always survive. Indira Gandhi and those who came before her, are gone.... For good and ill, they shaped what India has become... But India is much larger than any single person or a single family... Nehru's vision holds true... Like the mountains of Kashmir which Indira loved and from whence her family came, India endures....

Aloneness...

Loneliness has both a sort of sadness , sorrow and a very deep peace and silence in it..... It depends on us how we look at it....

It'll be very difficult to have one's own space... Its rare, we being alone... Always occupied.. From the moment of waking up till drowning into deep slumber... we are busy always... Occupied... One way or other we make ourselves occupied... We are afraid of ourselves... Afraid of spending time with oneself.... But unless we have our own space we will never become acquainted with our own self ... We always continuously live on surface.. Afraid of the depth...

When we are alone, we can start settling, sinking inward... Because we are not occupied, we wont feel the way we feel always... It will be different and strange.. To sink into ourselves...

And if we start sinking deep within and start loving ourselves, then we will be ready to love others even more deeply... Because one who loves oneself can love others better... Surface - living is not a living at all... Lets Plunge into ourselves... Deep... So that we love ourselves and make our relationships deeper....

Beyond Language

All that is great is beyond language

When there is so much to say, it is difficult to say it... Only small things can be said, only trivia can be said, only the mundane can be said.... Whenever you feel something overwhelming, it is impossible to say it, because words are too narrow to contain anything special n deep....

Words are utilitarian... They fall short when we move beyond ordinary life...  In love they are not useful... in prayer they are not adequate...

All that is great are beyond language........

Next comer.....!!!!!

I started this wonderful book,"Indira - The life of Indira Nehru Gandhi" by Katherine Frank.... Its so good.. I always loved and admired Indira Gandhi, for her unwavering boldness... There are staunch critics against her... But above all, I adore her.. She is the second women, whom i admire, love and adore, from my childhood only next to a dear friend, My Mother.... Since the leaders life is always interlinked with the history, we can walk through the past.. The flow is so good, that you'll have the satisfaction of feeling Indira, living with her in I, safdarjung road... Even if you hate Indira, at some point of time, for one thing or another, I bet u'll really admire her... If you say no, you are really two-faced or has propensity... (Sorry for being scabrous and biting !!!! )

I'm yet to culminate... Will come back with detail review of the book

Planned....!!! Shooting up for moon!!!!

After very loooonnnnggg time, i decided to break away the torpidity of the sloth within me.. The sequel of my exams made me to hibernate... mmm.. not exactly hibernation... a kind of withdrawal, pull back... I was not even au courant about my withdrawal.. I'm back now.. With all my verve, spirit, brio....

Planned for this week.. Nothing great... To an extent its a stupendous achievement, if i work out my plan... hope i'll do it... Got ready for the war again... Sometimes i used to be hellbent... Then i'll slowly come back to the real, Simon pure life... I'll feel myself to be an absurder, once in a while... But no hassling about that...

Decided to be a warrior... No more hotchpotch about it...

Adjudged to start.. with uberrima fides...

Voice of a grieved heart

வயதின் சுருக்கங்களுக்குப் பின்னே
வாழ்வின் பெருக்கங்கள்
வாழ்ந்ததற்கு அடையாளமாக...

தெருவில் எறியப்படுகின்ற
தேய்ந்த எந்திரங்கள்
படித்து முடித்துவிட்ட
பாட புத்தகங்கள்...

கவனித்து கொள்ள மட்டுமே நாங்கள்
கவனிக்கப்பட அல்ல .
வீசப்படும் வார்த்தைகளுக்கு வலிக்காமல்
தழுவி எடுத்துக்கொள்ள
பழகிவிட்டோம்.

விடைகள் கிடைக்காத உள்ளத்தை
உடையாமல் கொண்டு செல்ல
நடையின் வேகம் குறைத்தோம்.

சுமந்து எம்மை மறுநாளில்
கொண்டு சேர்க்க முடியாமல்
தள்ளாடும் நாட்கள்!

நிஜ விழுதுகளில்
ஊஞ்சலாடியதொரு
காலம்... இன்று
நினைவுகளையே விழுதாய் ஊன்றி
நிற்கிறோம் நாங்கள் !  

முதிர்ந்ததும் உதிர்ந்துவிடும்
மந்திரம் தெரியவில்லை...
முடியாதவற்றிலிருந்து ஒதுங்கும்
இங்கிதமும் அறியவில்லை..

மனவலியின் அழுத்தத்தில்
உடல் வலி மறக்கிறோம்...
உடல் வலியின் உக்கிரத்தில்
மனமிருப்பதையே மறக்கிறோம்...    

I read this recently in a tamil magazine.. written by K.P.Jana.. More than the selection of words, he just expressed the real feelings of most of the old aged people..That too, the last two para's was too heavy with pain and emotions... thought to share with you people...

Why cant we ensure them a happy aging!!! The old aged people's attitude towards aging is also an important factor... But someday or other everyone will be aged.. Why cant we appreciate their presence and use their experience in life...Just a food for thought...!!! Let us try to be the change which we expect in the society...

Thank you friends

Hello friends... Thank you so much for all your encouragement and support.. while i was starting, i didn't have any idea.. but with all your suggestions, i think i can make a decently good and a meaningful blog... thanks for all your support.. friends are always friends... wherever they are.. whatever they do... they'll be always around us.. let all your support, comments, suggestions be there always...